“How could she comprehend what it was like” by Julia on her couch

Tuesday December 5, 2017
4:42pm
5 minutes
Super Sad True Love Story
Gary Shteyngart

The oven keeps setting off the fire alarm.
Somebody (you) spilled cheese and forgot to
clean it up. You told me it wasn’t you.
I don’t really eat cheese.
Every time we take something out of there,
even if it’s a slice of bread at 350 for
2 minutes, the smoke gets the yelling
started.
I want to tell you to clean up your mess
but I am afraid you will tell me that
there isn’t anything to clean. I hate being
right about you.

The stove keeps setting off the fire alarm.
Somebody (me) left a penne noodle underneath
the burner and refused to take it out.
I told you it wasn’t on purpose. It was.
One day I discovered that if you leave a
penne noddle close to the burner but not in
a pan, it will cook it crispy enough to eat.
Everytime we boil water the smoke gets the
screaming started.
I want to tell you to take out the battery
but I’m afraid it might be too easy to
burn the whole place down with you in it
if you do.

“Amusement park adventures” by Julia on the fun chair


Tuesday April 4, 2017
8:57pm
5 minutes
from The YouTube video Joe is watching

HashBrown slurps chocolate milk up through a licorice straw and refuses to make eye contact with me
I stand there with my hands on my hips like my mama taught me
I say “I’ll wait” like my mama showed me how
“I’ll wait” means You Can’t Hide From Me
Means Don’t Think I Don’t See You Avoiding Your Responsability About This
means I’m Older Than You In This Moment With Your Sleeves
Pulled Down Over Your Hands