“The ads were put on billboards” by Julia at the cabin in Galina Bay

Wednesday June 26, 2019
9:45pm
5 minutes
The Tipping Point
Malcolm Gladwell

I’ve been told recently that bats love mosquitoes and will eat a billion of them at once. Why did I grow up thinking bats were scary? Because they are doing the Lord’s work as far as I’m concerned and I could have been team bats my whole life. Also team swallow. Also team whatever else wants to eat them. There was no ad on a billboard anywhere with the information. There always seems to be the wrong information on billboards. More cleavage more money more perfect teeth for perfect existence. I just want to know who’s out there fighting the good fight. I just want to know which creatures eat mosquitoes and which animals to pray to. I want to know what kind of bones are good to give a dog (raw) and how to spot a pile of bear shit (berries), or that this feeling will one day be a new feeling and I will be okay.

“This App Finds Every Discount On The Internet” by Julia at her desk

Tuesday June 11, 2019
9:32am
5 minutes
From a sponsored Honey Ad

I have questions about this. Mainly, is it safe.
Do I want some third party knowing everything I’m
interested in purchasing with money that I don’t
necessarily want them to be privy to?
I am not a daily shopper, a binge shopper, an expensive
shopper. I am, however, an impulse shopper, and
do I need those impulses to be made even easier to
act upon? Maybe I want to know if the shoes I’m saving up
for become more affordable, or the head phones, or the
baking sheets since I burnt the last good one we had.
Maybe, though, I don’t want my free time to be spent
“hunting for deals” because then at what point am I
L I V I N G. In the moment. Imagine that: real life!
It sounds alluring. Who is behind it? Is it the government?
Is it Facebook? Is it Nike? Is it sad that these things
make their way into my daily writing as if any of
it fucking matters? It’s one of the things I hate the most
about my generation, about the climate of existence
these days: The phone and its long cord was romantic,
the snail mail, a dream. To talk about a cellular device
that can make calls and simultaneously take photos
while connecting me to EVERY DISCOUNT ON THE INTERNET
is surely the opposite of that.

“I love the internet” by Julia at the desk

Wednesday September 5, 2018
11:09am
5 minutes
The Experimental Boy
Mat Laporte
Did you know that ladybugs are actually beetles? Where would we be without the internet? Without online check in. Without Google Chrome crashing every time I use it because of karma, likely. You can find out all the most important information: Am I going to die if I’ve eaten the same seeds for a week and today I found a tiny worm in them? How do I remove this wart on my foot using home remedies? Can I put a wool skirt in the washing machine? How do I wash my dishes if I am out of dish soap? Cloves is the answer. Did you know that?  I love the internet for watching my every move and tracking my routes traveled. I love that the internet knows where I live and who I see often and can recognize their faces in my photo apps and can suggest other e-mails when I’m writing to a certain group of people. Isn’t that what we’ve always wanted anyway? Someone to see us and know us and help us? Or some thing. Or someones. I wonder how many people know I care about what a ladybug actually is or that I’ve searched for the kind of porn with “gentle hands”.

“They would tell everyone” by Julia at her desk

Thursday, April 12, 2018
8:14pm
5 minutes
Audience of One
Rob de Boyrie

We can’t tell anyone because they would tell everyone.
Some things are better left secret:
all of our best-laid plans for a baby and her sister
the house we bought with our romance novel money
I am still reminding myself this is better
to wait until it’s done before I say it out loud
they wouldn’t let it be what it is if they opened their
big dumb mouths to name it
diminishing it with all that outside tongue
The photographer man told me this first
Years ago he wrote it on the front page of my moleskine dayplanner
“Not every single thing needs to be said.”
Maybe it wasn’t that exactly, but the sentiment was there
We can’t tell anyone that we’re swimming the Mississippi River
that we’re moving our butts to South Beach

“Paragraphs of information” by Julia on Nicole’s balcony


Thursday July 13, 2017
12:15am
5 minutes
from a syllabus

Of course I didn’t ask for the ring with the gold flower when she died. I had wanted it since I was small enough to fit in her arms. But I got something better. When I spritzed her perfume in the bathroom I thought I was getting away with curiosity. Turns out my curiosity was too big to ignore. It was the first time she held me. She brought me out of the bathroom with love while I was embarrassed at being caught. Then she gave me the bottle of perfume I had tried on. Just gave it to me. You like it? Here, it’s yours. I cherished that bottle. I kept it in my closet. I didn’t know anything about her-there wasn’t a book about her, not paragraphs of information written about this woman. But I knew the smell of her young skin. I knew the size of her generosity. I knew the way her quiet was her prison. And how she wished she could have given me more.

“Is it coffee time yet?” by Julia at the Greyhound station in Kitchener


Sunday, April 5, 2015
6:05pm
5 minutes
Overheard at the bus station in Kitchener

After you left the guy and girl had a fight of some sort. I heard him, the guy say, I heard the guy say that it was all her fault. I know for a fact he said..he said..”you’re going to get what’s coming to you.” And then he said “And you think it’s over but it’s not over.” So you didn’t miss much.
I didn’t follow Ancastor like you told me to. I didn’t want to approach him while I was at the bus station because I didn’t know if he would hit me or not. But I did certainly get a sense of that girl and guy who had been fighting. I chose in the moment not to follow Ancastor for you because he had a dog with him as well. He always brings the dog. Those two are inseparable!
But no, I didn’t do what I was supposed to do. You’re correct. I said you were correct. But you promised me a Tim Hortons triple triple if I got some information for you. And I did. I certainly did!