Tuesday June 7, 2016
Ellen told Brody she wouldn’t be joining him on the hike this year but she didn’t give him much notice. She had been holding off on saying anything until she knew for sure if she could or not. Brody didn’t think to ask if there was a reason. He focused on the fact that Ellen bailed on him so last minute and he had already put his money down. Brody sent a lot of passive aggressive messages telling Ellen that he wished he could “find a way to make some much needed cash asap–life is so unexpected, you know?” Ellen didn’t have the heart to tell him what was really going on in case he decided not to go all together. The last thing she needed was her best friend giving up something he had looked forward to every year just to stay at home and offer some unwanted pity. Ellen toggled between telling him the whole truth, and avoiding anything but.
Monday March 24, 2014
from the sign for Linda’s in Quidi Vidi, NF
She thought she was something that she wasn’t. She was trying, for his sake. “Sure,” she’d said, “let’s do it.” It was his dream to hike the Torres del Paine in Chile and how could I hold a guy back from his dream, or be left behind. “There’s no pressure,” he said, “you have to do something like this for you.
She’d never been so hot in her life and her thighs were chafed and her heels were blistered. He was happier than she’d ever seen him, smiling like it was the best day of his life. “It’s the best day of my LIFE!” He said, as he stretched in their tent every morning. She groaned. “Come on, trooper,” he pushed her shoulder, “let’s make breakfast…” She wanted to bite him, to punch him in the stomach, to push him down as he sped down the trail faster than she could. She wanted to break up with him, the reason she was out here in the first place, the reason she was tired and sore and angry. But, then what? They had seven more days to go.
Sunday December 22, 2013
Hold Me For Now
My backpack is heavier than when I started, and not because I’ve picked anything up. Hiking the Kalalau trail came to me in a dream. I had just left my lover, lost my job and cut my hair. You’ve had those times, I know you have. We all have and will, still. During that time I dreamt of tigers and jungles and skies with rockets. I dreamt of slicing pig snouts and skiing across sand. And then, I dreamt of the Kalalau trail. I didn’t even know it existed. I had to look it up. I don’t do my “looking up” like most people of my generation. I take the Encyclopedia from the bottom of my bookshelf and sift through the transparent pages. There it is. An eleven mile trail on the Napali Coast of the smallest Hawaiian island, Kauai. I booked my flight and here I am, three months later, my backpack heavier than when I started. It isn’t actually heavier, but it feels so, my ankles blistered and my body covered in scrapes and sweat.