“everything is ending” by Julia at the studio

Monday June 18, 2018
1:14pm
5 minutes
A Visit from the Goon Squad
Jennifer Egan

Good timing. I was about to flip my shit.
Who do I flip my shit toward, anyway? Is there
someone out there who has the necessary skills to
deal with shit being flipped at them?
Do they specialize in flipping shit back over or something?
It’s a good thing that everything is ending.
because I am not sure how much more beginning I can take.
New life, new friends, new ideas about my eyebrows.
This shit takes time to build and see and I think what is
worse is that it does not take long to flip, just long to
decide to flip it. Flip the shit I mean, If I wasn’t being clear.
Things are ending and the new moon is like, Yo, do your new thing.
We are all new. We are all brand new babies sucking on the nipple of life
hoping there’s enough milk to keep us from crying our heads off.
That’s what the new moon says. I swear to god she is full of shit herself
but like, it’s the moon, and she may be royalty but she’s not an asshole.
She doesn’t think she’s better than us.
I like my moon to have a little bit of attitude anyway.
She’s not pretending to be better than us new babies trying to navigate
this ridiculous existence. She sees it all, so she knows how common
the scrambling around is.
And now that everything is ending I can finally take a shit
instead of piling shit on shit and getting buried in a world
of my own misguided making.
I’m still talking metaphoric shit here, cause I never really let
that whole concept go. I’m working on making some more specific shit.
That’ll be good when it all ends and has to begin again.

“See the world” by Sasha at her desk


Thursday August 18, 2016
1:06pm
5 minutes
From a flyer

pop says see the world but i’m not sure what he even knows about that because he’s never left chesterton. probably something he’s heard on tv or something, like, a thing he heard someone say that he thought sounded smart. he never finished high school even, so what does he know. sorry pop. you know a lot about how to raise pigs, and how to nurse a pup back to health after she eats too much grass. you know a lot about corn. seeing the world? don’t know nothing about that. if i actually took your advice and left chesterton, i think you’d cry for a week. not that i’ve ever seen ya… but i can imagine. it’s been you and i since mama and berg drowned, since i was three and you were twenty six. mama has finally learned how to make peach pie, the crust and everything. at least that’s what you tell me. mama had just learned to make peach pie.

“Shrimp only” by Sasha at Szos’ desk


Tuesday, March 29, 2016
11:46pm
5 minutes
From a recipe in Cowichan Bay

Mama’s gumbo is the best gumbo this side of the river. She’d never say that herself. She’s not a Braggy Betty. Me an’ Kit ask for Gumbo at least three times a week but Mama only makes it on Saturday nights. Me an’ Kit are each allowed to invite over one friend for dinner that night. If we’ve been good all week, they can even stay for a sleepover in the treehouse. Kit’s growing out his hair and so sometimes people think he’s a girl. Mama tells me to stop teasin’ him and that if he wants to confuse folks that is “his prerogative”, whatever that means. I asked Helen to come over this Saturday. She’s never had my mama’s gumbo. I’m not sure if she’s ever even had gumbo at all ‘cuz she’s from New York State. Her daddy is in the army and they just moved here.

“Imagine having fantastic sex with him or her” by Sasha at Platform Seven


Wednesday, January 13, 2016
3:01pm
5 minutes
Instant Enlightenment
David Deida


You close your eyes and I know what you’re doing Owl Man. I see you for what you are. Hooo hooo hooo.

You lick your lips and I can only imagine what you’re tasting (creamed honey/Hershey’s kisses/body juices). Oh Owl Man, why don’t you just notice me for once?

You see me as the Pharmacist Assistant, the one who checks you out when you’re picking up your prescriptions (Zoloft, fungal cream). You see me as the overweight (“curvy”), middle-aged (“40 is the new 20!”), funky-haired (who actually knows how to henna?) woman who may be of Portuguese heritage. You, Owl Man, know me even though you think you don’t, even though you think this is less than it is.

You take a twenty from your wallet. It’s well-worn. You probably bought it in Greece when you were there to help people who were in some kind of crisis. OWL MAN.

“winexpert” by Sasha at her kitchen table


Saturday December 12, 2015
3:12pm
5 minutes
from a wine cork

When I opened my eyes and looked out the window, though, I
jus’… I lost it! I mean, all those little squares a earth an’ shit! An’ snow, all that white an’ the little cars and the little houses and my Ma was all, “What the fuck the matter witchu?!” But, I, I… We’re tiny, man. I know I’m a XL guy, but, like, we’re all this big.

I don’ know if I believe in God or what, man… I seen some
fucked up shit go down an’ I wonder about if this God would
really let that all happen… If this God is cool with Dad’s
runnin’ out, an’ kids bein’ hungry an’ on the street because
their Mama’s sellin’ themselves in their bachelor apartment,
like… Is that the God you want?! Is that the fuckin’ God
that everyone is prayin’ to? That’s a fucked up God, man.

“ideal cooking oil” by Sasha at The BC Children’s Hospital


Saturday, October 24, 2015
3:44pm
5 minutes
from the coconut oil jar

Bo knows her eleven times table best of alllll. It’s revolutionary how quickly she can spew it, shooting star glitter and candy corn, too. “I bet you don’t know what comes after thirty three?” Bo has bits of carrot in her braces. She’s the first one with braces in our class. Everyone admires them on day one, and then feels her pain when they rip her inner lip to shreds. “Need help with that?” Henry asks, as she smooths wax over the wires, protective gloss, true love.

“The stress that I have been carrying around with me” by Sasha at Kafka’s


Wednesday, September 2, 2015 at Kafka’s
11:30am
5 minutes
Teach Only Love
Gerald G. Jampolsky, M.D.


I been carryin a stress around with me like a trekking pack. You know the kind them backpacker hikers wear? With all the strings and straps and pockets? I got that stress from my Mama, right, and she didn mean to give it to me but she jus did.

Mama worked at the hotel on the highway, ya know the first one on the right? She’d work the desk all night so when people’s come cuz they forgets their toothbrushes and condoms and stuff she’d have that covered.

“I made this cake” by Julia on her bed


Sunday May 17, 2015
9:44pm
5 minutes
http://www.epicurious.com

I uhh…I made this cake for you. I’ve never made a cake before but I made this. Or like, I tried to, I guess? I mean. Yeah. A cake! For your birthday. And I know your birthday was like, a month ago. But I wasn’t confident enough to try making a cake then so, I didn’t give you anything and I wanted to, but I was embarrassed so I just pretended that you didn’t have a birthday at all so that you wouldn’t..uhh.. not get a cake from me. I also pretended that not even wishing you a happy birthday alongside not making you a cake was an okay thing to do. It wasn’t. It’s weird, it was just what I decided to do. Uhh…You don’t have to eat this even. The cake, obviously. It might not be edible, actually, because I didn’t taste it and I didn’t know how to taste it without wrecking it so I just took a chance and thought, maybe I’ll taste it first when we’re together so in case it’s bad there will be someone there to warn you. So if you want we can do it that way, or I can just stop talking now so you can stop wishing this was a different moment in your life and not the one you have to be in.

“Is it coffee time yet?” by Julia at the Greyhound station in Kitchener


Sunday, April 5, 2015
6:05pm
5 minutes
Overheard at the bus station in Kitchener

After you left the guy and girl had a fight of some sort. I heard him, the guy say, I heard the guy say that it was all her fault. I know for a fact he said..he said..”you’re going to get what’s coming to you.” And then he said “And you think it’s over but it’s not over.” So you didn’t miss much.
I didn’t follow Ancastor like you told me to. I didn’t want to approach him while I was at the bus station because I didn’t know if he would hit me or not. But I did certainly get a sense of that girl and guy who had been fighting. I chose in the moment not to follow Ancastor for you because he had a dog with him as well. He always brings the dog. Those two are inseparable!
But no, I didn’t do what I was supposed to do. You’re correct. I said you were correct. But you promised me a Tim Hortons triple triple if I got some information for you. And I did. I certainly did!

“Diarrhea Relief” by Julia at her kitchen table


Saturday January 18, 2014
1:01am
5 minutes
The Shoppers Drug Mart flyer

Oh Tawney, didja get em like I asked ya? Don’t make me write em down like ya did last time. It’s not somethin I like very much to write down. Sleepin pills, ya gran calls them, but we all know that’s not the only thing they do! Don’t make me say it, I won’t, I’m tellin ya, I won’t. Ya better get inside before Dr. Involved in everyone else’s business finds ya out here. He don’t like ya fraternizin with the help, I do remember him sayin. Of course not in those words. He’s got some tact, I’ll tell ya that, but he don’t care much for subtlety with them eyes a his. Rollin around the back of his head, not even aware that peoples is watchin em. Expressive, ain’t-e? Someone shoulda told im a long long time ago that-e was showin too much emotion and too many opinions with his silence. Not meant to be disrespectin anyone, I believe that, but sure don’t stop im from comin across as arrogant. I’m not sayin-e’s not a good man, cause-e is. Your daddy’s one of a kind, really.