“I nodded” by Julia at her desk

Sunday February 23, 2020
10:05pm
5 minutes
Bring You Apples
Cate Lycurgus

I nodded my head at the goings on in my brain and I let them bounce around.
A to do list so long it starts to eat itself but not from tail or head but right in the middle.
Sometimes it eats an item in half but doesn’t fight the others into stand alone beings.

I nodded at the idea of everything going to shit.

In the blink of an eye I saw the whole church, the congregation, the good book all keeping vigil.
There is about to be an explosion, a death, a rebirth we assume, but first, a noticing.
And I can see it the way I can the vibrations between two smiling faces, the way I can feel them when I rub my hands together or when I tell children about our internal energy and the power of our suspended belief.
I can go back and forth so easily you might think I was born a fish on legs, inching back toward the core of things after being washed up.
It looks easy, faith, and then, impossible.
It can seem pointless.

This is where another moment gets a nod.