“poorly aimed prayers” by Julia at Rivendell

Saturday January 19, 2019
10:18pm
5 minutes
On Why I Must Decline To Receive The Prayers You Say You Are Constantly Sending
Tony Hoagland

Jesus apparently lives in my heart and has never left even though I left him. He’s also quite feminine, the woman tells me, “Read the gospel of John and you’ll see how feminine he is.” I am now the prodigal daughter coming home. I had to leave in order to grow myself and wonder out loud with enough spaciousness to find something. Now I am returning and this is good because I am looking for the truth and that’s where I’ll find God too. She wanted to leave the room while I confessed how I’ve rejected him, or how I’ve felt disconnected, or why. Then I told her I wouldn’t do it if she left and so I made her stay. Maybe she had something to do for ten minutes that really couldn’t have waited and she was hoping I was into counselling myself. But maybe she thought I was strong and wanted or needed the stillness.

“poorly aimed prayers” by Sasha at her kitchen table

Saturday January 19, 2019
8:28pm
5 minutes
On Why I Must Decline To Receive The Prayers You Say You Are Constantly Sending
Tony Hoagland

I light candles nightly now
What am I saving the special for
I earn the tonic of beeswax
and glow the elements close
here as I stoke the growth
as I reach inwards and around
and down and up
Linking hands with the women
who have come before
the women who have bled
have birthed have braved
I lean towards the light and
aim my prayers seven generations
back seven generations
forward towards the centre of
the heart the centre of the earth
I blow out the candles before
brushing my teeth and turning in
the smoke washing my face
washing my day washing my hands
the sacred so close
the sacred everywhere
cusp of the full moon
swelling