“isolated, alienated, and uncomfortable” by Julia on her couch

Wednesday June 27, 2018


5 minutes

from quillette.com

We spend a month apart while she thinks things over about me

I have been thinking things over about her

I am sad and heavy and fine all at once

What is this narrow minded thinking that she claims to hate?

How could you let someone tell you what to believe and then build a wall around yourself so mention of it never gets in?

I am upset that she will listen to other people but not to me

I should have written it all down sooner because now I am forgetting the details

How much should I learn before I make up my mind?

How can someone I love and trust be so fundamentally different from me?

My questions are filled with more gas, float to the ceiling and hang there

What is the dealbreaker for you?

What is the thing you will learn about me that locks the nail in the coffin on whatever this thing is that we’re doing now?

It feels like punitive measures but she says there is love

I know there is, but right now I have to wonder

Will it last?

“isolated, alienated, and uncomfortable” by Sasha on her balcony

Wednesday June 27, 2018
5 minutes
From quillette.com

You died seventeen months ago. I count in months because years doesn’t give the weight. I stopped counting in weeks, in days, because that felt too heavy. There probably hasn’t been a minute that I haven’t thought of you, a whole sixty seconds. No way.

Pete said that you basically killed yourself, that you wanted to die. I said I wasn’t sure about that.

I play your guitar on the front porch and sometimes the cat from across the street comes and rubs against my legs. Is it you?

I saw the light only for a slippery moment – somewhere between here and there. I saw that I’m not fit to love again, not yet, I’m not fit to wife another husband, not yet.