Thursday April 27, 2017
My mother always wanted to go to school but never believed she was the academic type. My father liked to tell her she was worthless on a daily basis so my mother didn’t believe she was much of anything. Once I watched him mash up the meatloaf she made and crumble it between his fingers until it was all on the floor. He smeared the sauce left on his hands across her forehead because he claimed it wasn’t warm enough. I watched my mother forget how to put on underwear the next morning because she couldn’t forget what he did. She couldn’t because nobody could.
I watched my mother model for me a woman who wanted so many things but got buried before she had time to even realize them.