“holier-than-thou” by Sasha in Mary Bollert Hall


Tuesday November 17,2015
1:32pm
5 minutes
from an e-mail

I just moved here and my friend Toby in Atlanta said he did one of these Craigslist posts when he first moved there and he met some cool people so… Here goes nothing!
What you might want to know about me:
I clench my teeth when I sleep.
I eat spoonfuls of peanut butter with chocolate chip hats on top for breakfast three out of seven mornings a week.
I have a holier-than-thou attitude towards two things and two things only – politicians and buzz-cuts (politicians with buzz-cuts – BEWARE).
I wear platform shoes even though I can’t really walk in them because being tall is a totally viable aspiration.
I have never smoked a cigarette, gone para-sailing, touched a nipple, eaten squid, shopped at the Gap, or liked the colour fuchsia. (Fuck fuchsia!)
I’m looking for friendship and love in whatever shape, form, size, quadrant, place, space, etc. etc. I don’t discriminate. I just pontificate! Wut wut!