“I can’t even go on Facebook today” by Sasha in the Alberta Theatre Projects Rehearsal Hall


Wednesday, July 10, 2013
7:14pm
5 minutes
Overheard by Sasha in the rehearsal hall

She couldn’t believe that you did it over text message. “Hey V, this isn’t working. I’m sorry. B” She couldn’t believe that you didn’t even take the time to write her full name. She called you thirty nine times, never leaving a message, but waiting til the voicemail kicked in so that you’d have to delete, you’d have to spend time thinking about what you’d done. She sent you a single e-mail. It read: “You are the absolute worst.” She didn’t sign off. She didn’t fill in the subject line.

She’s been playing this game. She’s been seeing how many Pringles she can fit into her mouth at once. She asked me to change her Facebook password because she can’t go on. She’ll creep you. She’ll look at and maybe even download every picture that you’re tagged in. She won’t be able to resist Liking your status from a couple of weeks ago that involved a hike in the hills and her beautiful sunburn.